When Greg and I climbed into the car Sunday to go to Easter Sunday mass, I announced I didn’t want to go.
For the past twelve or so years, I’ve been a mostly regular church goer, most of it fueled by challenges in my life, me looking for help finding ways forward. But the pandemic uprooted that routine– Greg and I had been using Saturday evening as our date night starting with mass and then dinner out– it became harder to get used to going back to church.
That has been compounded by a lot of recent traveling for Chelle Summer. All is well and moving forward and not going to church doesn’t mean God isn’t in my life. But Lent for me this year was pretty absent as many of my Saturdays were in the car and Sundays at a market.
We had been in LA last weekend and next weekend we’re off Palm Springs so I really wanted to stay home Sunday. It feel luxurious to have a day where I don’t have to be anywhere and can get lost in my creative bubble. My life is a balance of being with people and giving myself the quiet time to create, too.
There is a woman at church who plays the piano before the 8:00 am Sunday mass. Greg really likes to listen to her play so we went early enough for that. When she began to play “On Eagle’s Wings,” one of Mom’s favorite songs (that was played at both Denise’s and Mom’s funerals), I began to have the sense that I was supposed to be there.
And then when we were asked to bring up the gifts for communion, to me sort of an extra spiritual blessing at mass, yes, I knew I was meant to be there.
As Greg says, I always feel better after mass. But this was especially true on Easter when Fr. Rob gave such an excellent homily on light and hope. I would have been sorry to have missed it. Even when life is going fairly well, we should never forget God is with us and be grateful for what we have. And when we’re busy and can’t make it to spend a little time in a spiritual space with our spiritual community, there are always good reminders around us.
As Fr. Rob said, “We should promise our Lord we’ll keep our candles lit.”
And so I am.